Previous Winners
Eric Hall
Eric Hall
Shoot first. Ask questions later. Apparently this is this
cocksmoker's
philosophy. This pig smoked this innocent family's
pet dog while following up on a "tip" that they
might be robbers. In actuality, the father of this family
forgot his wallet on the roof of his car after pumping gas.
Miles down the road they get pulled out of their car with
guns at their heads while begging the public servants
to close the door to their car so their dog didn't get out.
Maybe if these bacon fucks had spent less attention to the
"too much TV watching" hysterics of some anonymous
cell phone caller (who perhaps is the true asshole of this
story - she's obviously living in a cartoon world where bags
of money fly out of windows and have $$$ written on
the side) and more attention to the people in front of them
then maybe this situation could have been diffused without
stupidity.
As usual, in the media they discuss the video as if the average
moron can't figure out what happened. There's really no
room for interpretation. They assumed guilt, they
didn't listen to them repeatedly ask for them to close the
door to not let the dogs get out and then Eric Hall wasn't
paying attention to the dog until it came up to him where
he shot it instantly without a second for judging it's intent.
Noelle Bush
Noelle Bush
This played-out crack whore is the epitome
of unequal
justice in America. Our country LOVES to jail our
own and nothing is more exemplory of that than throwing Americans
into jail for drug use. Our prisons are swelled with drug
"offenders" and we imprison more of our own people than any
other civilized country in the world. Except when it comes
to little girls of famous politicians. Life must be hard being
the daughter of so many millionaires.
I sincerely hope Noelle is higher than a moose getting a
blowjob in this picture cause if she isn't - she needs to
quit sleeping with her face in the toilet.
The FBI
FBI
Joseph Salvati defied thugs with baseball bats who came
to collect it for their partner, mob hit man Joseph ``The
Animal'' Barboza. When Barboza became a government witness,
he fingered Salvati as an accessory to a gang murder - out
of revenge. For more than 30 years, the FBI
hid memos showing that other men, including an informant
it wanted to protect, were the real killers. Now Salvati is
seeking 525
million in damages.
Rev. Graham
Rev. Franklin Graham
"Why haven't Muslim clerics from around the world gathered at ground zero, held hands together
and prayed to Allah for forgiveness and told the American people this is not Islam? Because they believe it was right. This is
a just cause -- their jihad."
Ok - fuck organized religion in general, Mr
Graham. That means your Christianity at the top of
the heap. Seems this stupid fuck has forgotten the Crusades
(jihad?) or priests sucking
dick like a neighborhood laundromat crack whore.
Brandon Eldred
Brandon Eldred"They dragged a 3-month-old llama
named Willie Wonka under a fence. It struggled to get away
but was clubbed, kicked and punched. Its left eye was gouged
out. When an adult female llama named Monopoly approached,
they turned their attack on it. Monopoly
died a few hours later on the way to a hospital. A
necropsy found that the llama had been sodomized and suffered
50 to 100 blows, mostly around its reproductive organs.
A weeping
Brandon R. Eldred pleaded with a judge for leniency,
saying he should be sentenced lightly for his crimes because
he was remorseful, had found religion and had changed his
ways." What the fuck ever. Remorseful in a courtroom? Un-fucking-heard-of!!! Apparently he realized that it's not only the llama that is going to
be sodomized and suffer 50 to 100 blows - "mostly around its reproductive organs." Enjoy!
E. Woolley
Elizabeth Woolley
America, land of the lawsuit. Where accountability inevitably
rests on the shoulders of everyone except the person who's
retarded enough to take stupidity to the next level. Such
is the case of Ms. Wooley who's suing the makers of the PC
game Everquest. Her son is a major loser, epileptic, quit
his job and ignored his family so he could play this video
game 12 hours a day. Then one day after playing the game he
committed
suicide. Now mommy is suing and plenty of family advocates
who probably still use Doom as a reference point for violent
video games are backing her up with the typical catch phrases
('EverCrack' - 'It's like cigarettes. They need to come with
a warning label.'). We can only hope suicide runs in the family.
Ariel Sharon
Ariel Sharon
The media and government of the United States has historically
backed the Israelis unconditionally while they bulldoze homes
and shoot Palestinians yet when Palestinians fight back
they are called "terrorists". Both sides are babies but America (the babysitter) is eating Cheetos and watching Armageddon while the 10 year
old bounces the 4 year old brother off the wall. When the 4 year old tries to bite back, America yells from the other room and then quiets down when the
bully starts in again. In 1982, current Israeli Prime
Minister Ariel
Sharon was Defence Minister and gave the green light
to Lebanese Christian Militia to enter the refugee camps of
Sabra and Shatila in west Beirut, which consequently resulted
in the massacre, torture and rape of hundreds of unarmed civilians,
mainly women and children.
Mke Tyson
Mike Tyson
This psycho fruit is perhaps almost as undeserving of his
millions as Keanu Reeves. I say almost because even though
Mike Tyson is a bumbling retard at best; he is actually somewhat
proficient at his profession of choice. The opportunities
this guy has with his millions to expand his mind are staggering,
yet instead of reading a book once every decade he gets slapped
with rape
charges and bites people more than a cannibal in a
Ruggero Deodato film.
Donald Rumsfeld
Donald Rumsfeld"They will be handled not as prisoners
of war, because they are not, but as unlawful combatants."
Says our braindead Defense Secretary. Yeah, change the wording
for the idiotic American public and they'll eat it up like
every bad episode of Ally McBeal. I'll agree with Rumsfeld,
they're not prisoners of WAR because war was never officially
declared. Since there are very specific laws for extraditing
criminals from foreign countries and since a Congress approved
war never happened - perhaps we should call them "kidnapped"
since that seems the most appropriate.
Thomas Junta
Thomas JuntaThe first new jackass of 2002 goes
to this moron who obviously doesn't understand the word "hypocrisy".
This pumpkinhead objects to an occurance of checking in his sons hockey game
and expresses this concern by beating
the coach to death. They need to start sentencing
people based on sheer stupidity. In that case this guy would
get a life sentence with no option for parole, and restitution to boot!
Winona Ryder
Winona Ryder
Winona is a sad ass case because this chick has a $3 million
dollar home and has absolutely no need on any level to shoplift.
Need an adrenaline rush? Build a midget tossing stadium. So she's on Zoloft - poor Winona
- a lot to be depressed about I can imagine. I live in 550
square feet bitch!
Walt Disney
DisneyThis company is a shit factory plain and
simple. If I ever had a kid, I would do what was humanly possibly
to shield him/her from the stupidity of this evil corporation.
Anyway, I would rant and froth about Disney endlessly but
when others before me have labeled and listed the issues so
precisely, I am far more willing to pass the torch.
Allstate
AllstatePerusing the web by typing in Allsnake
as opposed to Allstate brings up the other side of the insurance
company. It appears that people from all walks of life have
had to deal with semi-sized loads of bullshit when dealing
with the "good" hands of Allstate. From being dropped on homeowners
insurance after 2 claims in eight years to doing everything
they can to squelch on paying, it appears these cheap bastards
negate the supposed comfort of being insured into a torturous
struggle when you most need them.
hill & knowlton
Hill & Knowlton
Remember the stories of babies being taken out of incubators
and left do die when Iraq invaded Kuwait? Well, the PR Firm
Hill & Knowlton was responsible for the creation and perpretation
of that story into mainstream media. The media is as equal
to blame for the load of bullshit heaped onto the American
public as the firm was for coming up with outright lies to
engage the populace into support for action. Read this
for further information.
John Ashcroft
John Ashcroft
This guy is probably the polar opposite of what an attorney
general should be yet somehow he got the gig. Sort of like
Hitler applying for a job as a counselor at YMCA summer camp
and actually getting it. Read this article
about the laws he has sought after the Sept 11 attack.
NY Crime Unit
NY Street Crime Unit
It seems like cops get away with pretty much anything these
days. On top of doing completely offensive acts that are hypocritical
to their job at best and downright fucking evil at worst -
they seem to get promoted with the same stroke in which they
fuck up. I swear if a pig wants two weeks off all they have
to do is find someone - beat the shit out of them and then
get suspended WITH PAY until its resolved (always in officers
favor). The New York Street Crime Unit appears to not depart
from the bad
cop stereotype that is all too common.
Ronald Reagan
Ronald Reagan
This empty pumpkinhead was/is a festering boil on the rectum
of America. Anyone who thinks trickle-down economics is a
viable economic plan either makes 200,000 a year or is working
on just a brain stem. Read this article about the Reagan administration
and Guatemala.
Ishii Shiro
Ishii Shiro
If anyone has ever seen the HK film Man Behind the Sun -
it is about a camp the Japanese set up in Manchuria called
Unit 731. It was used as an experiment camp with an estimated
3000 Chinese and Russian peasants being experimented on. Ishii
Shiro was a microbiologist who conducted disturbing
experiments at this facility.
Paul J. Hill
Paul J. Hill
On March 10th, 1993, Dr. David Gunn was shot and killed as
he was about to enter an abortion clinic in Pensacola, Florida.
Paul J. Hill was the nutjob whose thought processes appear
to be most similar to a rotting catfish. Read his psychotic
ramblings here for a good laugh at how demented the
bible can make one.
Ari Fleischer
Ari Fleischer
This guy seems similar to the Paul Reiser character in Aliens.
Squirly, underhanded and apt to fuck you over when you least
expect it. And for some reason I can only imagine him running
like Priscilla Queen of the Desert on fire. Sure being a spokesperson
for Dubya's White House might be challenging with the President
himself is perhaps only handicapable of operating a Speak-N-Spell
at best, but if you had to say or pull the shit that this
guy
has done since he's taken office - suicide is the
only answer. Ya hear that Ari?!
CIA
CIA
Yep, our government has lied to us. Some people are overboard
conspiracists. At least they are in the right frame of mind
even if they might get lost blaming everything on a conspiracy.
Then there's people that can't believe our government would
wrong us Americans. Those people are ignorant "patriotic"
dumbasses. Read this page
detailing America's own terrorism with CIA sponsored biological
attacks on American cities.
Pat Robertson
Pat Robertson
Christianity. Hm. Christian Coalition. Pat Robertson. Hm.
Frightening words aren't they? Organized religion is a sham
and these fuckers need to start paying taxes to lighten my
load. And take that "in god we trust" off American money.
Seems awfully like a mixture of religion and state. Anyway,
Pat Robertson is a stupid
asshole.
Nazi America
Nazi America
Many people don't know about sterilization practices in America
that were a model for Hitler's Nazi Germany. Many people don't
want to know about our dark past and would prefer to ignore
it - ensuring that we do the same stupid crap time and time
again. Read this
article for information on this whispered about part
of our history.
Pigs
Pigs
Cops do so many bad things it would take volumes of pages
to detail even one counties corrupt deeds. Here is one
story of some bastards badgering witnesses to finger
a guy who didn't do the crime - storming the guys house while
he was asleep and beating the fuck out of him. Who pays for
the $1 million dollar lawsuit tab from the guy suing (and
rightfully so)? Us, the taxpayers.
Dubya
Dubya
Could we have a stupider president? I mean - I'd rather have
a local septic tank installer manning the helm of the country
than this dirt for brains simpleton. This guy can't even say
"Hello" without reading it stiffly off a teleprompter and
then even fucking it up to boot!
Besides the fact of his obvious brainlessness, this man is
one dangerous fuck to the world. His previous track record
has nothing in it that dictates that he should be President.
Indeed a Fortunate Son. Read about a situation
when he was governor of Texas.
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